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The Once And Smurfy King/Part 2
While Sophia was busy writing her story, Goofy went to tell his friends who had gathered together at Tapper's Tavern, which was now run by his two daughters Fiona and Meaghan. Fiona, the ginger-haired female Smurf, worked behind the counter to fill her customer's orders while Meaghan, the brunette-haired female Smurf, worked as a waitress, ready to give lip to any customer that dared to sass her or make any wrong moves. "I'm telling you, fellows, that Sophia really believes that Uncle Brainy was never King Smurf," Goofy said. Empath's daughter Psycheliana sat at a table with her friend, Polaris Psyche's daughter Libra, listening to what Goofy had said. "So what do you smurf about this, Libra?" Psycheliana asked. "This one thinks it is pointless to believe in something that is contrary to the facts of actual history, Liana," Libra replied in the same dispassionate tone as her father. "It serves no real purpose other than to confuse people who want to learn about what really happened during the time when there was a King Smurf." "You mean like people who smurf my Papa Smurf's holy book and believe that the earth is only about 5,000 years old when the evidence suggests it's been smurfing for a million years or more," Meaghan said. "Well, I can't help it if my sister believes it to be the case, but personally I think smurfing your faith in a story book is just a waste of time." "The Holy Scriptures are more than just mere stories, Meaghan," Fiona said. "It's the actual history of God's chosen people that led to the smurf of the Almighty's only begotten Son in the flesh of a human being." "Right, that's what Papa and you keep smurfing," Meaghan said with a bit of sarcasm. "I think that we should smurf the lassie about the truth of the matter so that there's no smurf in her mind about who really was King Smurf," Duncan McSmurf's son Malcolm said. "But what are we going to smurf to her that we haven't already smurfed to her about it, brother?" Duncan's daughter Gillian said. "If Sophia's going to believe that another Smurf besides Brainy became King Smurf back in the day, there's nothing we can smurf to change her mind." "Well, who is she really smurfing with that belief, anyway?" Hefty's son Bruno said. "If that's what she wants to believe instead of the truth, because it makes her feel better about her Papa Smurf, then who are we to smurf otherwise?" "That still doesn't smurf it the truth, no matter how many Smurfs believe in her account, Bruno," Fiona said. "I can understand Sophia's need to smurf her Papa Smurf in a better light, Fiona," Psycheliana said. "After all, Uncle Brainy isn't exactly the most popular or even the most liked Smurf in the whole village, and most of us are only able to tolerate Sophia when she doesn't try to emulate what her Papa Smurf does." "What makes this one curious is how Sophia will even try to make Uncle Brainy into a more respectable character in her version of the events from history," Libra said. "I don't know about that part, but I've got to smurf Sophia the benefit of a doubt," Goofy said. "If she knows how to smurf a story that I would want to read, I would be the first to support her no matter what." "Well, as my Papa Smurf would say, may the luck of the Smurfish be upon her...because she's going to need it," Meaghan said. ------ As Sophia's story continued to be written, Brainy and Clumsy are seen walking together in the story at the point where Brainy and Anonymous were busy in their efforts of their election campaign. It was during their walking together that Clumsy noticed posters being put up around the village, featuring Anonymous' face and saying VOTE FOR SMURF. "Gee, Brainy, are you smurfing this?" Clumsy said, sounding fascinated. "Anonymous has got his face smurfing all over the village. He must be smurfing well with his campaign, don't you think?" "Clumsy, Anonymous advertising himself like this isn't going to smurf voters who want a real Smurf who is capable of leading them like I am," Brainy said. "He's just another smurf in the crowd hoping to be somebody important so that everybody can smurf well of him when he doesn't smurf anything to the table that would make Smurfs notice him." "But Brainy, how are you going to smurf voters that will vote for you tomorrow if you're not smurfing what Anonymous is smurfing?" Clumsy asked. "Trust me, Clumsy, that my methods alone will make Smurfs realize that Anonymous is all flash and no substance, as some Smurfs are fond of smurfing," Brainy said. "By tomorrow, most Smurfs will be smurfing the right decision because they will be well-informed to smurf the right decision from a Smurf who knows how to smurf the right decision on every occasion." Suddenly the two of them could hear the sound of a big band playing, and they could see a crowd gathered around the village square. "Gosh, Brainy, I wonder what all that excitement is for," Clumsy said. Brainy saw Tapper standing in the back of the crowd and decided to ask him. "Say, what's all this noise smurfing on in the village square that has smurfed every Smurf's attention?" "Oh, Brainy, you should smurf it," Tapper answered, sounding excited. "It's Anonymous smurfing a big campaign parade to get Smurfs to listen to his speech tonight. I only hope that you're going to be there, because I can't wait to hear what Anonymous has to say." "Please, Tapper, don't tell me that you've been smurfed up by all the hype about Anonymous Smurf," Brainy said, sounding displeased. "Normally I wouldn't be, Brainy, but I just got a feeling in my spirit that Anonymous may be just the leader we need smurfing at a time like this," Tapper said. Brainy and Clumsy tried to look over the crowd to see the parade for themselves. On a cart being pulled by a few strong Smurfs, Anonymous was standing there with Smurfette beside him, impressing the crowd with his presence. Behind him and in front of him were Smurfs carrying banners boasting his greatness as a Smurf, with some advertising the campaign speech he was going to give that night. "Golly, I wish that I was up there with Smurfette, Brainy," Clumsy said as he watched the parade passing by. Brainy snorted. "Well, I can only wonder what it is that Anonymous did that would get Smurfette to help promote his campaign, Clumsy. And I bet that what he did wasn't very smurfy." "Are we going to smurf to the campaign speech tonight, Brainy?" Clumsy asked. "Of course we are, Clumsy," Brainy replied. "After all, the Smurfs deserve to hear from both candidates so that they would know for sure who they're going to vote for tomorrow. And when they all vote for me, every Smurf is going to forget that Anonymous even existed in the first smurf." ----- Later on at evening, every Smurf gathered around inside the meeting house, eagerly waiting for Anonymous to step up to the podium to make his speech. Brainy sat with Clumsy, ready to give a speech of his own once Anonymous was finished with his. Soon after every Smurf was gathered inside, Anonymous walked in through the doors, looking like a Smurf who was well-prepared for that moment and confident that he was going to get every Smurfs' attention and applause that night. All the Smurfs except for Brainy clapped when they saw Anonymous enter and head straight for the podium. "...and as Papa Smurf always says, 'Every smurf will live at the expense of the person who smurfs'," Brainy tried to warn the Smurf sitting next to him that wasn't Clumsy. "Smurf this truth, because Anonymous with his rhetoric will..." The Smurf sitting next to Brainy shushed him, signaling that the speech is going to begin. "My fellow gentlesmurfs," Anonymous said in a manner that got every Smurf's attention, "I'm usually a Smurf of few words, so I'll make my words smurf. Tomorrow you will choose a leader, and all I smurf of you is to choose wisely. Some Smurfs want to be leader so that they smurf high above their peers all day. I choose to smurf among them. Some Smurfs want to be leader so that they can smurf orders without anybody questioning them. I choose to be the Smurf who will listen to your problems and your solutions and smurf decisions based on what you smurf me." "Oh, Duncan, doesn't he sound like the Smurf who is right for smurfing the position of the village leader?" Smurfette said, sounding captivated by Anonymous' words. "Aye, he sure sounds like he's got the spirit of a McSmurf within him, lassie," Duncan responded. "I choose to be the leader who will be wise and compassionate and generous," Anonymous continued as his speech became more energetic. "I choose to be the leader who will never smurf my back on my fellow Smurfs. I choose to be the leader who keeps every single promise I have ever smurfed with anybody. I choose to be honest and fair in my judgments. So tomorrow, if you have to choose any smurf, all I can smurf is...VOTE FOR ME!" All the Smurfs except for Brainy clapped in applause for Anonymous' speech, finding it to be the very words that they needed to hear and believing that he was going to make good on those words. After the applause died down, Anonymous asked, "So do any of you smurf any questions?" "I have one," Brainy said as he eagerly stood up and raised his hand. "My question is: why should anyone vote for any Smurf besides me? Indeed, Papa Smurf has always said that I was the one who..." "Just a moment," Anonymous said, interrupting Brainy's train of thought. "If my honorable opponent would let me smurf a few words, I would gladly smurf him the opportunity to smurf his peace." "Gosh, Brainy, you finally get to smurf to the crowd why they should vote for you," Clumsy said, sounding eager to listen. "Naturally, Clumsy," Brainy said. "After all, Anonymous doesn't smurf a chance of winning this debate." "Meanwhile, any of you who are smurfing thirsty, I would like to invite you all to smurf a fresh glass of smurfberry wine with me, courtesy of our good friends Vino and Tapper," Anonymous continued. The mention of smurfberry wine got every Smurf's attention as they raced out the door and headed straight for Tapper's Tavern to enjoy themselves. All, that is, except for Brainy, Clumsy, and Grouchy, who stayed behind in the meeting house, with Clumsy sitting in his seat to listen to Brainy and Grouchy sitting in his seat looking rather undecided. "Smurfs and fellow citizens," Brainy began after he had stepped up to the podium, "Insofar as I am the representative of Papa Smurf and that he smurfed me his authority time and again, I must remind you that a smurf in the hand is worth two in the smurf, and that not withstanding, a smurf a day keeps the smurf away, while a smurf does not make summer, and thus smurf is the root of all evil. Some will say that you can smurf a smurf to water, but you cannot make him smurf, and furthermore..." "I hate listening to Brainy's speeches," Grouchy said as he got up and walked out of the meeting house, leaving only Clumsy as the one Smurf who would stay and listen to the whole speech. ----- And so that night, the Smurfs went back to their houses, most of them falling sound asleep, with Brainy feeling certain that he was going to win the election no matter what. However, only one Smurf was still awake, and it was Anonymous, who was pacing around back and forth inside his house, worrying that some Smurfs may end up not voting for him. Then came morning, and the Smurfs gathered around the meeting house which was converted into an election headquarters where every Smurf would put in their vote as to which Smurf they would want to see as the village leader. Tapper, Barber, and Sweepy ran the headquarters to make sure the Smurfs cast their votes in an orderly fashion, while Duncan watched to make sure there would be no Smurfs that would try to vote twice. Tapper handed a slip of paper to each Smurf before they entered the voting booth, while Sweepy made sure that the Smurf casting his or her vote had their privacy in doing so, and Barber called out for the next Smurf to enter after the previous Smurf slipped their paper with their vote on it into an urn. There were a few delays as some Smurfs had trouble casting their votes, and one Smurf unfortunately spilled ink all over his slip of paper, making his vote invalid. But nonetheless there was hadly any problems up until after Brainy cast his vote. He tried to slip back in line to vote again, but Duncan caught him doing so and was soon expelled from the headquarters. Brainy tried a second time to slip back into line, this time without his glasses, but as Duncan noticed that Brainy couldn't see where he was going when he tried to cast another vote, he guided Brainy to the door and gave him a boot to the rear. Soon enough the voting was over, and Tapper, Sweepy, and Barber would go over every single vote to count them up and see who would be the Smurf chosen to be the village leader. The Smurfs tried to patiently wait outside until all the votes have been counted up. Anonymous began to worry when the vote counting took a bit longer than he was expecting. "What's smurfing them so long?" he said as he nervously paced around. "We should have had the results smurfed by now." "Oh, don't worry, Anonymous," Smurfette said, trying to comfort her friend. "I'm sure that you're going to be the winner." "Well, I am quite certain that Anonymous is going to lose and that I, Brainy Smurf, am going to be the one who is elected, and since that is going to be the case, I have already prepared a speech in honor of my soon-to-be victory," Brainy said rather confidently, causing the other Smurfs to groan. Soon Tapper stepped outside the door with a sheet of paper. "And so, finally, my fellow Smurfs, we have the results of the vote," he announced. "With 95 votes versus 3 and a smurfed ballot, the winner is...Anonymous!" Every Smurf cheered as they heard the news...every Smurf except for Brainy, that is. "Hey! That's not fair! I demand a recount!" Brainy whined. Smurfette gave Anonymous a kiss on the cheek. "Consmurfulations, Anonymous...you're now the leader of the Smurf Village," she announced. Anonymous looked astonished at what had just happened. "I...I can't believe it, Smurfette. I won." The Smurfs gathered around Anonymous cheered and gave him a ride on their shoulders throughout the village as they congratulated him for his victory. On their way, the group passed by Dimwitty, who called out, "Hey, Anonymous, I did just what you have smurfed. I voted for Brainy Smurf." "Smurfs, I have just the thing that I want to show you," Anonymous said. "Smurf me to my house and you will see just what it is." The Smurfs carried Anonymous to his house, where they gathered waiting around outside as he went inside to get the very thing he wanted to show them. "What do you think he's going to smurf us?" one Smurf asked. "Maybe it's smurfberry wine," another Smurf said. "Or maybe it's sarsaparilla," a third Smurf said as he licked his lips in anticipation. "Ooh, there he is...look!" Smurfette called out as she saw the door of Anonymous' house open and he stepped out, wearing a shiny new Smurf suit of a different color, resembling a metallic weave of fabric. The Smurfs in the crowd started to laugh at the sight of Anonymous in the new clothes. "Oh, this is just too much," one Smurf said. "Now he's a total dandelion Smurf." "Well, I think it's certainly an attractive new look for him, don't you agree, Smurfette?" Vanity said. "Certainly...if he's attracting bees," Smurfette said with a giggle. "Why are you smurfing on a yellow outfit?" another Smurf asked. "This outfit isn't yellow...it's gold!" Anonymous said, sounding rather defensive. "Seriously, laddie, you're not going to smurf around wearing that as the village leader now, are you?" Duncan said, trying to contain himself. "And why not, Duncan? It's no more ridiculous than you smurfing on that kilt all the time," Anonymous said. "From now on, you shall call me Lord Smurf the First." The crowd of Smurfs just exploded with loud laughter, realizing how ridiculous Anonymous had now become. "Lord What the First?" one Smurf said. "Makes you wonder what he's been smurfing lately," another Smurf said. "Oh, yeah, what a maroon," a third Smurf said. "Well, I'm sure glad that we voted for him," a fourth Smurf said. "This is so funny, Tapper, I think that I'm going to pee in my kilt," Duncan said. "As profane as it may be to laugh at our friend like this, even I find myself amused by this, my fellow Duncan," Tapper said. Anonymous felt so humiliated even by the sight of Smurfette laughing at his new appearance that he just went back inside his house and slammed the door shut. "How dare they laugh at me, after all that I have smurfed for them," Anonymous snarled as he paced around inside his house. "But I will smurf them. They will learn to properly respect me." Then came a knock on his door. Anonymous realized that someone wanted to see him, so he said, "One moment", while he prepared his chair and table to give an appearance of somebody in command. "You may enter," he finally said after he had positioned himself to greet his visitor. The door opened, and it was Harmony. "Say, Lord Smurf the First, remember that you...," he began to say as he entered. "Stop!" Anonymous interrupted. "Address me as your Lordship." "Okay, then," Harmony said, clearing his throat before he began again. "Say, Your Lordship, remember when you promised me that you would smurf me the chief soloist of a smurfing band? Well, now that you're elected, I was just thinking that..." "You're right, Harmony," Anonymous said, interrupting his fellow Smurf again. "I did smurf you a promise, and I would be foolish not to smurf up my end. However, I believe that you are a Smurf with a much greater destiny in smurf for him. A Smurf of your scope should not be smurfed in such a minor role as to smurf around in mere parades. So I decided to smurf you in a much more important position." "Really?" Harmony said, sounding curious to find out what it was. Anonymous went over and put his hand on Harmony's shoulder. "Harmony, I will smurf you the distinct and unprecdented honor of becoming the first official chief spokesperson of Lord Smurf the First," he declared. "And to make this official, I will smurf you your first assignment." Anonymous went back to his desk to write out a decree that he was expecting Harmony to deliver to the masses. Then he handed Harmony the message along with a drum kit to use as his signal. "Here...take this decree and smurf it to the entire village," Anonymous said as he gave the items to Harmony. "But...but...but I'm just a trumpet player and..." Harmony tried to protest. "Oh, there's no need to thank me, Harmony," Anonymous said as he showed his fellow Smurf to the door. "It's the least that I can smurf for you." Smurf to Part 3 Category:Empath the Luckiest Smurf stories Category:The Once And Smurfy King chapters Category:VicGeorge2K9's articles